Class Clown or a Big, Fat Bore?

28 05 2009


Today was the last day of school, which meant teachers sent home the last report cards. I love the “teacher’s comments” section. Very telling.

Juniper’s said things like, “a joy to teach!” and “delightful!” 

Roofie’s teacher made no secret of his behavior issues. In the second-to-last term summary, she wrote, “Really work on thinking before you act- self control!”

She offered a more charitable review this time, but it left me feeling uncomfortable anyway. It said, “I’m glad you were in my class this year. You always kept things interesting!” 

Kept things interesting. That was very…diplomatic.

Look, I am sure that if I took him to his pediatrician about possible ADHD, we’d walk out with a prescription. He has organization issues, he doesn’t finish his work on time, he disrupts class…

But if he were medicated, would he be as fun and as charming as he is now? I mean, his classmates all wrote letters to one another for an end-of-the-year gift, saying nice things about each other. All the letters were bound with a twist tie, the cover laminated yellow and green. His letters all say the same thing. Here’s a little sample:

-You are very funny because you make funny noises and funny faces. You play funny game with me.

-You are very smart. You are a very good friend. You are the funniest person in the class!

-You are a nice friendly dude and you are hallareous.

-You are so funny. The minute I saw you I knew you were going to be funny. I like you as a friend a lot.

More than one letter from a classmate has characterized him as “off the wall.”I suppose that’s better than being “off the hook” or worse, “off the CHAIN, yo!”  

Would a medicated Roofie be that much fun to be around? He might grow to become a model student, but would he be a bore? I don’t know what’s worse.




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